Seasons Greetings - lessons from the past 18 months

Happy Summer Solstice! During the traditional time for such missives, I did not have the energy or clarity to send out much. Now, after a blessed retreat, I am ready to share some of my recent lessons --- * Retreats aid intentional living. I had no real idea why I was going to Ireland for 4 weeks. Our trip was like falling through a crack in time; all moved at a different pace. John O’Donohue said, “We have made time the enemy. Stress is a perverted relationship with time. Time is the mother of all presence.” For many years, I have started each day “knowing” there was not enough time – I think this is his definition of perverted. The gift of my work is that it requires me to fully show up; I am continuing to learn how to bask in the spaciousness of now. *Self Awareness is so much easier with compassion. Thanks to my lessons in self-compassion I am more able to notice what I actually do or say. I feel more open-hearted, even around my shadow. It is helps knowing I may not use these observations to beat myself up. *Attention is powerful – use it wisely. Reading about neuroscience this year has given me great hope for change. We CAN sculpt our brains by what we attend to; what do I want to focus on? That requires both knowing what I want to create and awareness of where my attention is going. This awareness has encouraged me to enhance my mindfulness practices. *When you follow your heart, it is amazing to watch how it unfolds. Many wise people have said something similar to Joseph Campbell’s quote “Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls.” And even though I have experienced that before and believe it for others; I am challenged to hold the faith for myself. And yet, as I get clear about where I want to focus my energy once again opportunities open up that I did not imagine. For example, I knew I wanted to host more retreats this year. The number is up 200% over last year and growing... Knowing how powerful it is to focus on what I want to create, I am sllllllooooowwwwlllyyyy learning to trust the process. In case you are wondering what readings have been influencing me this year: Buddha's Brain, Flourish, Mindsight and Self Compassion are at the top of the list.

Retreating in Ireland

Noughaval church (upper left) is from the 12th Century. It was not on our maps or in our plan. We stumbled upon it after missing an unmarked ancient burial mound.

I approached this retreat without a goal. I had an intention to be present and to move with my energy; to allow the retreat to unfold. As we face our last week, I wonder if I didn't really have a secret wish for a great "aha" or a creative break through. Instead, so far, I have had a series of little lessons. Dis-mantling Fear Early on I did remembered about the power of fear - driving on the wrong side on these narrow roads at high speeds is terrifying. At times when facing a large upcoming vehicle on my left and a stone wall on my right, I felt like I closed my eyes and prayed I had threaded the needle. (I only told Ellie this much later.) After we arrived in our cottage, we did not use the car for a few days. Then we booked a spa day at the Falls Hotel, only 15 miles away. As the car trip approached, I realized how debilitating my fear was; imagining hitting walls and fire-filled crashes. Once I noticed where my mind was going, my first instinct was to deny it, not give it energy. That was not working; so instead I journaled about the fear. It began to disapate right away. With my fear faced, I practiced centering and visualization. The day before the trip, I imagined driving with ease. I did this as I was falling asleep and again in the morning. And I repeated the basic centering practice I learned from Wendy Palmer.

The ride there was OK, periodically I did a quick centering. The drive home was much better; I felt more in control. Now it is almost like getting into the car at home, almost...

Two lane road on Inisheer, Aran Islands

Focusing Energy on What Matters Most

What makes the difference?
One of the most important lessons I have learned in my career is the power of a time out. From short breaks in the day to silent retreats. It is amazing how stepping away clears my vision, renews my energy and generates creative ideas. That is why I am walking across the deck to sit silently in A Room of One's Own for 48 hours during one of my busiest times. My intention is to restore my energy and to see through my massive "to do" list to discern what is really mine to do.

I am grateful that I have the carved the space. Grateful I can stay close to home. And grateful my husband supports these breaks. After the last one, I came back in such a good mood, he suggested I should do these more often...I think I will!